He’s the scandal-plagued rep from New York’s 9th District

I was listening to the “Sixties on Six” radio station on Sirius XM this morning, and an old favorite from Jan and Dean came on. “The Little Old Lady From Pasadena” was originally performed by The Beach Boys before becoming a Top Ten radio hit in 1964 for the surf music duo. Among their other hits were “Surf City” and “Dead Man’s Curve.”

For whatever reason, the tune became stuck in my head. Later, while scanning The New York Times website, it occurred to me how well a parody of this song might work to describe the current scandal of a certain congressman from Queens.

While I’m not enough of a singer to do such a song justice, I do consider myself a magnificent libretist. Those of you old enough to remember the tune might appreciate my effort.

There’s this guy in Congress named Anthony Weiner
(Go Tony, go Tony, go Tony, go)
Has a girlfriend online but he hasn’t seen her
(Go Tony, go Tony, go Tony, go)
But she’s seen him and his engorged member
They’ve been texting and tweeting since last December
 
Now everybody’s sayin’ that it’s smaller and leaner
Than they’d expect from a guy named Anthony Weiner
He types real fast and he types real dirty
He’s a terror on Twitter when he’s feelin’ flirty
He’s the guy from Congress named Anthony Weiner
 
If you see him on Facebook you might un-friend him
(No Tony, no Tony, no Tony, no)
Not even fellow Democrats will try to defend him
(No Tony, no Tony, no Tony, no)
You knew he’d get found out sooner or later
Now he can’t keep his hands off his wife’s vibrator
 
Now everybody’s sayin’ that it’s smaller and leaner
Than they’d expect from a guy named Anthony Weiner
He types real fast and he types real dirty
He’s a terror on Twitter when he’s feelin’ flirty
He’s the guy from Congress named Anthony Weiner
 
You see him all the time on the cable news shows
(Whoa Tony, whoa Tony, whoa Tony, whoa)
He says he’s sorry and yet still his nose grows
(Whoa Tony, whoa Tony, whoa Tony, whoa)
The lies keep comin’ as he swigs on his drink
A little smell turned into a great big stink
 
Now everybody’s sayin’ that it’s smaller and leaner
Than they’d expect from a guy named Anthony Weiner
He types real fast and he types real dirty
He’s a terror on Twitter when he’s feelin’ flirty
He’s the guy from Congress named Anthony Weiner
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