Palin is just on vacation — that’s all

Former Republican vice-presidential candidate Sarah Palin continued her East Coast bus tour yesterday, insisting it didn’t represent an unofficial start of her campaign to become her party’s 2012 presidential nominee.

“Can’t a gal take her family on summer vacation?” Palin asked one inquiring reporter. “We’re just drivin’ around this great country, enjoyin’ its great scenery and great landmarks, meetin’ great people and droppin’ the letter ‘g’ every chance we get.”

Palin was asked why her bus was festooned with patriotic slogans if the trip was meant as a private one.

“Hey, that’s just the way we roll,” Palin responded. “Some people put those little family outlines on their back window, some have bumper stickers. We take the whole side of our bus to promote ‘We the People — One Nation, Under God, Indivisible, With Liberty and Justice for All.’ That’s how much we love America.”

Palin started her excursion Sunday in Washington, arriving at a motorcycle rally on the back of a Harley.

“I had never ridden a bike before. It just seemed like a fun thing to do on a vacation,” Palin reportedly told one supporter. “Later in the week, I hope to try parasailing, maybe onto the grounds of the White House.”

After stopping in the nation’s capital, Palin and her family headed to several other historic venues in the mid-Atlantic region.

At the military academy at West Point, she observed that the Army college “isn’t as pointy as I thought it would be.” At Gettysburg, she talked of how “not only is this hallowed ground, but the bushes and the trees and the sidewalks and the public restrooms are all equally hallowed.” In Philadelphia, she observed that “the Liberty Bell has a crack in it. Has anybody noticed that? Should I tell someone?”

On Tuesday, the Palin bus rolled into New York City where she had a luncheon meeting with real estate billionaire Donald Trump in a sign that the Apocalypse is nigh.

“He’s such a nice man,” Palin was overheard telling her husband Todd. “Why can’t you be more like him? We need more money.”

Some of Palin’s potential rivals for the nomination are also enjoying summertime excursions. Mitt Romney said his choices for an annual getaway had been narrowed down to the south of France and New Hampshire, and that he was leaning toward the Granite State. Newt Gingrich was planning an extended weekend trip into his wife’s pants. Former Minnesota Governor Tim Pawlenty wanted to go to Disney World, but wasn’t sure his parents could afford it this year.

Palin’s fellow ultra-right elder-hottie, Rep. Michele Bachmann, will be leaving her Minnesota home next week, riding on a flower-bedecked float all the way to Iowa.

“She’s still in the exploratory phase of any potential campaign,” said advisor Tom Andrews. “It’s an expeditionary float. She’ll be sitting atop the vehicle and waving at the crowds as she makes the 350-mile journey. If anyone waves back, I think that means she’ll be in it to win it.”

One bus, under Todd, unmaneuverable, with liberty and sleeping space for 8

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